Do you remember your first place? You know that “cute”, “little”, hole in the wall that you called your own, and you couldn’t be happier to be out of your parents house and living on your own…until you realized you had to feed yourself? Well I remember that, and I remember my horrible meals of cheese and crackers. Yes, I would come home from work and feed myself my “World Famous Cheese Platter” which sounds fancy but really was almost expired cheese and Ritz Crackers, grab a glass of wine and eat on the couch while watching whatever I wanted on TV. On nights I felt fancy I would pile on a bit of turkey meat from the deli that I got “last week sometime” that was just about to turn, and then use Triscuits instead of Ritz….ooooo…I was living on the EDGE.
While my meals have become MUCH healthier and with much more variety and now includes fiber, I find myself sometimes longing for the days I could eat cheese on the couch and that would count for my dinner. Now I know, I’m an adult, I can eat whatever I want, wherever I want, it’s our house I can do it. However, now i try to be a good role model for our daughter and not have her have memories of mommy eating cheese and crackers for dinner on the couch…somehow that’s not a very flattering memory. 😉 So I own my adulthood and feed my family real food, however I miss the instant gratification that random food provides for me, and where I have very little level of effort to produce something that simply makes my stomach stop growling and happens to go very well with a glass of wine.
So I’m making it public that I have found my replacement meal for my Cheese Platter. Lately I’ve been feeding my family…Corn Dogs. Yes, you read that right. The freezer kind. Individually wrapped, right out of the freezer, onto the pan (at least I use the oven…sometimes it’s the Microwave or “The Wave” as I like to call it), and onto the plate. The level of effort had dropped significantly and it feels kind of good.
So that leads me to my next thought, do you think the Chefs on Food Network ever go home and heat up some Corn Dogs in the oven for their family? Not creating their own hot dogs from pigs they raised on their super farm they have and using organically grown wheat that they hand ground into flour, but really go to Costco, buy the Hebrew National Corn Dogs, take them out of their flimsy plastic sheath and then throw them in the oven.
Now, some Food Network Stars I can see them doing this very easily. Let’s take Guy Fieri…this man loves to eat and he travels the world and has other people cook for him. Now this guy, he’s gotta love the Corn Dog night. Anne Burrell is like this too, this is a woman who can appreciate a beer in her hand her feet up while the sweet smell of cooked hot dog dough fills the air.
Other Stars, I’m thinking don’t even know what a Corn Dog is until I explain to them it’s a Dough Dipped Frankfurter…I can hear it now…”OH!!! A Dough Dipped Frankfurter! Yes I make those out of my organically raised pigs in my back yard! Why didn’t you say so?” 🙂 Ina Garten is one of these people in my book, she is sweet as pie…the pie she hand crafted into the shape of an apple in the most elegant and simple manner. I also include Marc Forgoine in this category too. I bet he LOVES to cook, but he’s so serious I just want to run up to him in the kitchen and jump up and down like a monkey to make him smile. Then there’s Gordon Ramsey who very well may call a Corn Dog a “Piece of Dog S#!T” I”m sure. But I digress.
Corn Dogs, that’s right…so the guy I can’t pin down is Bobby Flay. Now, he loves to grill so I’m veering yes on eating Corn Dogs as the core of the food is a hot dog after all, and hot dogs beg to be grilled….but it’s also a dough that requires baking in an oven. I’m sure he could figure out how to grill frozen corn dogs and make them into some sort of fancy delicious fish meal, but really, do you think he ever actually goes home, grabs the box of corn dogs and says to his family…”Well we have two options…Corn Dogs with Ketchup or Corn Dogs with ketchup and Mustard” which is almost my exact quote to my family the other night.
So Bobby Flay, if you’re out there in the world randomly Googling yourself and come across this post I would love to know a few things.
1. Have you ever made corn dogs out of the box.
2. If the answer to #1 is yes, I want to hear all about it, I want to know what kind of Corn Dogs you had, when it was, and how you presented this delectable to your family.
3. Have you ever made corn dogs from scratch? Did you call them Dough Dipped Frankfurters?
4. If the answer to #3 is Yes, please send me the recipe, I will make them and blog about it. I promise.
5. Finally, if you only answer one question, please answer this one. Will you please come to my house and meet me and my family? I will give you a cold beer, a cheese platter, and make you a mean corn dog….with or without mustard.
So back to reality, and the empty box that is my fridge…oh wait, I have Cheese and Crackers….dinner is ready!